Episode #20 – Microwaves

Mike / July 10th, 2012

Comments

  • gamerz

    July 10, 2012 at 4:49 pm

    zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  • July 10, 2012 at 4:51 pm

    A-FRICKING-MEN.

    This is my biggest appliance pet peeve, and my biggest first world problem. Microwaves need a silent mode.

    • Cineassacre

      March 28, 2013 at 9:44 pm

      A mute button. Haha.

  • zupertompa

    July 10, 2012 at 4:53 pm

    Must have been hard to shoot all the “you know whats bullshit” episodes in that mask.

  • Steelebourne

    July 10, 2012 at 4:55 pm

    I’m just waiting for your eyes to burst out of that mask. They get wider in every single bullshit video!!

  • ToKinGarg

    July 10, 2012 at 5:01 pm

    I thought this was one of the funnier bullshit episodes. I HATE my microwave and work late so most nights i starve when i get home from work due to the loud ass beeping waking up my wife. Also loving all the content lately, keep it coming.

  • Eltanin

    July 10, 2012 at 5:08 pm

    I couldn’t agree more. This is now one of my favorite bullshit episodes alongside with the one about printers.

  • oceanborn82

    July 10, 2012 at 5:19 pm

    Please scrap the mask or overdub the sound when speaking with the mask. The sound is too different from mask to overdub and sounds so bad.

  • tsburesh

    July 10, 2012 at 5:38 pm

    Microwaves use a type of radio wave that was originally designed by the millitary during the cold war as an experiment in replaceing radar and sonar by using waves capable of passing through most objects while reflecting off of metal ones like planes and subs.. The creater only found the practical aplication when he found that when working by the machine his candy bar would melt due to the waves speeding up the molicules in the candybar therefore warming it up.

  • Cloudgarden

    July 10, 2012 at 5:43 pm

    Well, I’m not officially a microwave-ologist, but I can explain. You see, microwave ovens utilize microwave light beams to heat food. It uses microwaves because of the relationship between microwaves and water; water molecules in the food are roughly the same size as a single microwave wavelength, and because water molecules are slightly magnetic, every wave that passes flops them upside down and then right side up. This adds kinetic energy to the molecules, which pass on the energy to surrounding particles. The added average kinetic energy in the food is what you interpret as heat. The reason metal reacts violently is because metal molecules are sensitive to ionization, and when the microwaves interact with the molecules, the metal is oscillated and ionized much more than water, heating it up incredibly quickly. The beeping is just kind of a vestigial function from when they were first invented and beeping was “cool.” Or something.

  • Czab

    July 10, 2012 at 5:44 pm

    I own a cheap-ass microwave which doesn’t have any buttons even. It only has a knob, you turn the knob to the time you want to heat your food and that’s it. No beeps, it only makes a small *bling* sound when it’s finished.
    I love my microwave :)

  • FrikiGamerNerd4

    July 10, 2012 at 5:56 pm

    I also hate that biping sound
    >o<

  • karluzz

    July 10, 2012 at 6:11 pm

    This video makes all the ugly fucks out there have a little hope in their lives. Just notice that the Bullshit man appears with a ring in his finger, which means he’s married even though his face is a pile of shit.

  • Aaron1375

    July 10, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    I was expecting a rant more along the lines of some microwaves being so overly complicated that they are a pain to use. I know at my job we had a microwave most of the employees could not quite figure out.

  • rudy023

    July 10, 2012 at 6:23 pm

    You want to know what’s really bullshit? Those customer rewards cards at grocery stores. An item is on sale, but if I haven’t given the store my information to sell to God knows who to get this precious card, I have to pay regular price. & if I forget to tell the cashier I have the card, I don’t get the special price and have to wait in a long ass line at customer service to get it adjusted. Make something on sale or not on sale, don’t make me have to waste my time with a million fucking little cards attached to my keychain that I need for every damn place I shop at! NOW THAT’S BULLSHIT!!!

  • Tparsons5150

    July 10, 2012 at 6:30 pm

    I’ve always wondered if other people got bothered by the beeps for every press, and waiting for 1 second to cancel to stop the End beeps,. LOL I thought I was the only one who got that annoyed

  • dicobalt

    July 10, 2012 at 6:30 pm

    I stop the microwave at 1 second too, that ending beep is the most annoying beep of all.

  • fireworka

    July 10, 2012 at 6:45 pm

    My favorite one after “Temperature.”

  • AhaMcCoy

    July 10, 2012 at 6:54 pm

    You know what’s bullshit? People who don’t read the manual and think they know everything about the appliance.
    For most of microwaves, you can disable that sound. In my microwave, for example, I just have to hold the button “8″ for 3 seconds. No more beeps.

  • diegowar

    July 10, 2012 at 6:57 pm

    Ahah, I guess you didn’t want to repeat yourself, but the bit about food not heating the same in every parts definitely belongs in this video ^^

  • liononzion

    July 10, 2012 at 7:07 pm

    Somebody invented it, Its called a Microwave Oven and its Bullshit! hahaha best outro ever.

    but that beep when your foods done does come in handy tho. Especially when your loaded. lol maybe whoever invented this thing was loaded. They were all like yeah wer’re gonna need that beep.

    )Remember anything that was ever invented was for dumbasses.hahahahaha

  • July 10, 2012 at 7:11 pm

    @oceanborn82
    It sounds crappy because I used the camera mic. The reason I used the camera mic was because I was planning to overdub (or ADR) all of them. I overdubbed the Traffic Spikes episode, but it took several hours for me to be able to repeat the same exact rhythm in my voice.

    I was recording the new voice-over straight into the Final Cut timeline, and with headphones, carefully listening/watching my original footage. I only worked with small segments at a time, and still could not get my speech to match up again. ADR is not a skill that I have. I even looked all over the internet for ADR software to help sync the audio. I couldn’t find anything for Mac.

    It was a huge waste of time on the Traffic Spikes episode, so with the rest of the episodes, I left the original shitty audio. I should have used my shotgun mic, but I didn’t know I would be keeping the audio and that ADR (overdubbing) was so time consuming.

  • GoaterSlayer

    July 10, 2012 at 7:20 pm

    @Czab

    Your comment made me finally register to post on here. Dude, I have the same kind of microwave! Old one, kind of small and not very powerful. But it has a knob and it doesn’t beep, just a bing. I even got a new one recently that’s bigger and more powerful, but you had to press a button to open it and the beeping was annoying so I switched back to the old one. I too love my micro wave, the old one.

  • [email protected]

    July 10, 2012 at 7:22 pm

    You know what’s really bullshit is that microwaves finish heating your food, shut off, then beep incessantly until you open the door, but ovens only beep ONCE then continue to heat your food into perpetuity.

  • July 10, 2012 at 7:26 pm

    the audio, its not that bad, I can understand everything you say James and I hardly notice the transition. I mean I notice it but its not keeping me up all night. I personally love the mask but you just cant please everyone I guess…

  • Ben_from_G-town

    July 10, 2012 at 7:35 pm

    Ah, I totally hear ya’ there. I just had this problem recently. I had family visiting, and I want to heat something up in the microwave to eat, and the damn thing has to beep incessantly! Thanks to all the fans we had going, I don’t think anyone heard it. But still… it’s bullshit!

  • fmdof

    July 10, 2012 at 8:06 pm

    the fork in the microwave is a myth. it does nothing. The foil is truth though. I forgot the exact reasons why, but you’re fine forks, spoons, knives,etc.

  • Kenshiroh

    July 10, 2012 at 8:14 pm

    I am not hearing the annoying audio thing that other people are hearing.

    I read once that its the shape of the metal that determines how it reacts in the microwave. (I may have actually seen this in a Mythbusters episode, but I can’t remember for sure.)

  • Grizly

    July 10, 2012 at 8:28 pm

    microwaves are DEFINATLY bullshit!

  • July 10, 2012 at 8:29 pm

    Why don’t you just use a mechanical microwave? Here in Chile they are very common. They are reliable, almost never broken and they don’t BEEP. Just want to give you a solution…
    Great work, by the way.

  • Sakura4anime25

    July 10, 2012 at 8:31 pm

    oh… my… gosh… that is probably my biggest pet peeve ever, when people leave something in the microwave and they don’t get it out when it’s done so it just keeps going BEEP BEEP BEEP, so I usually reset the timer to shut it up XD

  • jessejace

    July 10, 2012 at 8:43 pm

    Actually, in principle, any conductive metal object with protruding points can cause sparks and arcs in a microwave. This includes silverware AND foil, but the danger is reduced if the foil isn’t crinkled (i.e., pointy).

    [pushes glasses up on nose]

  • vgamer567

    July 10, 2012 at 8:44 pm

    i hate microwaves, but yes james, i somtimes forget that i put food in there, like when im playing a video game and i want to get back to it, or watching live televistion andi dont want to miss my show. same thing with a toaster and freezer. BUT THAT BEEPING IS BULLSHIT

  • 1957sputnik

    July 10, 2012 at 9:30 pm

    happy birthday james and thanks for the new bullshit episode

  • PcFish

    July 10, 2012 at 10:35 pm

    I have a newer microwave that has a metal rack that’s grounded. It lets you put your metal pans in the microwave to heat things up.

  • marc_lawson

    July 10, 2012 at 10:56 pm

    nailed it! I have been pissed about the unnecessary beeping for 20 years now! I can even hear it when my neighbors use the fuckin thing. why does it think it’s so important? “Stop the press! Somebody’s fucken cup o noodles is ready!”

  • BouncekDeLemos

    July 10, 2012 at 11:22 pm

    @ fmdof: It’s not a myth at all, it might depend on the microwave. Mine sparks when I leave a fork/spoon/ whatever in it….

  • Xen11

    July 10, 2012 at 11:45 pm

    Microwaves are one of those things that people accept and never question and yet its extremely dangerous. Think about what you’re fucking doing. You’re zapping your food with radiation and then putting it inside of you. Very stupid. Don’t do it. Just heat your food in a toaster oven or a regular stove.
    It’s been proven that heating foods in certain bowls merge particles to your food and cause cancer. Styrofoam too, among everything else.

    I’d rant about x-rays as well, but I guess this is not the time. But to sum it up, you are zapping yourself with ionizing radiation. It kills and mutates your cells CANCER . Doctors/nurses/orthodontists/airport security don’t give a fuck because they were told in their colleges they paid for that its safe, but its not. It’s a money-maker and they don’t give a fuck about you. You get cancer, that’s more money in their pocket.

    That saying that “its so small it won’t hurt you” is a false notion that caught on.

    They say the sun is worse, which is bullshit because that’s not being beamed like a death star into your body. And if the sun put out more x-rays than an x-ray machine, why do we need an x-ray machine. Just take my x-ray using the sun. But you can’t because its all a lie. Sunrays are filtered through our depleting ozone and its spread out.

    You got a broken limb or a knife stuck in you, fine, take that x-ray, its worth it. But for a bullshit checkup or to take dental x-rays is absolute bullshit and its murder. I also find it odd that they x-ray your whole fucking head to check out your teeth. They even sometimes let you wear that vest to protect your torso, but apparently “Fuck your brain.”

    Chemotherapy is just killing you and hoping the cancer dies first, but it never does and it will come back to life with you if you manage to survive. There are natural ways that do actually work and cure cancer.

    Real doctors that speak out against these atrocities get booted from the cult.

    The point is to not accept anything just because the retarded majority accept it.

    Think about it.

  • superhyperduck

    July 11, 2012 at 12:45 am

    my microwave has a dial timer it doesn’t beep either just clicks when its done. oh and dehydrated food can cause an overload and cause your microwave to shutdown. carefully arranged grapes can arc. and marshmallows grow! but sadly they pop and are no good anymore :(

  • tweej

    July 11, 2012 at 1:02 am

    I love the series but I’m not on board with the stupid mask. That thing has got to go. Am I the only one who thinks it’s stupid?

  • Klitzbrieg

    July 11, 2012 at 1:03 am

    @Xen11

    Chemotherapy saved my mother’s life and you’re an asshole.

    Now make sure you don’t stand to close to a microwave with your hat on.

  • marc_lawson

    July 11, 2012 at 1:36 am

    @tweej

    I agree the mask is dumb, but he already filmed ten new episodes back to back with the mask so we kinda have to accept it for now. it isn’t very subtle is it?

  • Eschia Mousehold

    July 11, 2012 at 2:21 am

    If you don’t like it beeping, take a screwdriver, take that bad boy apart, and rip the speaker out. :)

  • ssbb king

    July 11, 2012 at 2:41 am

    ya knooooow whats buuuuuulshit? internet commercials. I have to sit there and watch this stupid commercial that can be anywhere from 15 seconds to a full minute. 90% of the time the commercials dont even pertain to me in any way whatsoever. And if I want to watch another video on the same site, its more than likely its going to be the exact same one I just saw. If Ive seen it once, why in the holy hell would I want to watch it again?!? If I wanted to watch commercials, I would have simply turned on my television!!!

  • oceanborn82

    July 11, 2012 at 3:08 am

    @James

    Thanks for reply, sure it’s understandable. I guess I’m more fussy than most as I work with audio and music etc so differences in audio quality bug me to no end. Still loving the show though! =)

  • Nemmex

    July 11, 2012 at 3:12 am

    Oh God I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time. It’s so true.

  • rug269

    July 11, 2012 at 3:48 am

    way, way, way! to much use of the mask, this episode is literally embarrassing to watch because of it. stop trying to get so much out of it, its a cheesey prop that only distracts from content and serves to trivialize this show. use it only in moderation and for direct demonstration

  • Chainsmoker

    July 11, 2012 at 4:24 am

    Ya know Whats BuuuulLSHit…… The mask. Seriously though I’ve loved nearly everything I’ve seen from Cinemassacre. That mask is the only thing that really brings my piss to a boil. It suckin’ fucks, it fuckin’ sucks….(takes swig of Yuengling)… and I don’t like it.

  • doctor_g

    July 11, 2012 at 5:23 am

    this is the stupidest complain i’ve ever heard. who in the name of fuck makes you own this fuckin thing? anyway, manual to my oven says “to turn the sound off press adjust time button and start button for 3 seconds”. and you didn’t heard about interaction between metal and microwaves? what a cheap ass fuck! it’s elementary school program! so here’s my recipe for you: pickle your dick with half a bottle of old red wine, put it into hell gates of your noisy box of doom, hit the timer for 2:30 minutes with max power, wait for the fuckin sound and serve it covered with thick layer of turds. you’re welcome.

  • Red

    July 11, 2012 at 5:57 am

    I stop the microwave right at 0:01 every time.

  • mizunomaku

    July 11, 2012 at 5:58 am

    I’m afraid I have to agree with everyone that’s been posting about the Bullshit Man mask… It’s taking away from the content of the videos. It WAS a cute gimmick when you first brought it out. But you’re really over using it lately.

    I’m all for getting your money’s worth out of the thing, but it’s getting to be that the focus of the videos is the mask, not the rant.

  • Peron

    July 11, 2012 at 6:33 am

    The mask is cool, is just another character, like the Nerd or Board James. These comments about it are stupid and unnecessary.

  • Entrenaturaleza

    July 11, 2012 at 6:43 am

    Excellent, I love the bullshit saga.

  • fade2black

    July 11, 2012 at 6:47 am

    I love YKWB, but i think you should be a little more consistent: since when you have your mask on you sound different than when you do the voiceovers, you should either record voiceover with the mask on or dub yourself over in the scenes with the mask… just my 2 cents :) anyway you are the best :)

  • wildcatterry17

    July 11, 2012 at 7:01 am

    Microwaves are actually very simple. You have a device called a magnetron which emits microwaves which then excites the water molecules inside the food causing them to vibrate at very high speeds causing the food to warm up from the inside. This is the reason why Hot Pockets are so hot on the inside. All the food on the inside of the Hot Pocket such as the cheese and meats have much more moisture than the outside bread causing them to heat up much quicker than the outside. Hope that helps.

  • Onaka

    July 11, 2012 at 7:05 am

    Excellent point. Though if you’ve got a soldering iron and some other low cost tools, you could VERY easily run a switch for the beeper. Just get one of those drill-hole mounted switches and drill a hole for it somewhere where it makes sense. Just make sure not to run the wiring near the high voltage side.
    I think I might do that with my own microwave.
    Or hell, just snip the wire going to the beeper. Safe, easy, fast.

    That guy who made your nintoaster could rig a switch up in 15 minutes.

  • jimbeam958

    July 11, 2012 at 7:51 am

    I was going to comment on how stupid this was, but after thinking about it some more I’m actually happy for you that your life is so good that you’ve run out of stuff to complain about. And I agree that the difference between your mask voice and your voice over voice is rather off putting.

  • J.J. McSandfarm

    July 11, 2012 at 8:08 am

    Terrific episode, James! Love the mask, didn’t notice the voice differences until everyone pointed it out (might be that I just woke up, dunno) but I agree, beeping microwaves fucking suck. I often hit the door open button with 1 second left so that I only get 1 beep when I clear it. I always heat up my beans in the microwave for when I make beans and rice with pork and red onions, and when I’m frying the meat and onions and I hear that the beans are done I always spin 180 degrees around in a flash and hit that stupid door open button right away so that I don’t have to hear that damned beeping. It’s aggravating.

  • urineg

    July 11, 2012 at 8:56 am

    Thanks for uploading this on youtube also, so that everyone can watch

  • poncho

    July 11, 2012 at 9:48 am

    hmmm i have non beeping microwave. just like this:http://s.swistak.pl/i/poradniki/mikrowela.jpg

    and to be honest, it gives ONE short ring after finish. nothing more:) old but better:P

  • louman

    July 11, 2012 at 10:34 am

    Who would win in a Fight Between The Bullshit man, AVGN, and Board James?

  • Al J. Krimson

    July 11, 2012 at 11:00 am

    I have the old microwave, so it doesn’t beep anywhere. You may say it’s old analog microwave because it doesn’t have digital display. Only analog handles and when it’s done it has pleasant sound of ring like in hotels. So it’s cool :)

  • WilliamPorygon

    July 11, 2012 at 11:46 am

    You know what else is bullshit about microwaves? All the unnecessary buttons. You know what I mean, the ones that have names of foods like “Potato” or “Popcorn” or “Vegetables” on them. Does anyone actually use those? I’ve never met anyone who does. And really, why would you? Anything you buy that’s microwavable has instructions on the package telling you how long to put it in for and if you need to use a lower power setting. And if you don’t have instructions, like if you’re reheating leftover Thanksgiving turkey or something, you just estimate. If it comes out too cold it’s no big deal, you just put it in a little longer. How long it should take depends on how much food you’re cooking. Most microwaves I’ve seen just go blindly cooking based on some average size. I’ve seen some microwaves where it’ll ask you about the size after you press the button, but even then, I’m not stopping to weigh my food every time so the microwave can figure out to the second how long to cook for. And then some of these buttons are ridiculously generic. “Frozen dinner?” Really? Come on, that could be almost anything! But what it really is, is bullshit.

  • pro_thizz

    July 11, 2012 at 11:55 am

    lol i’ve actually had to run to the microwave to try to stop it before the timer runs out several times because of people sleeping in my house. I think we need to send this video to microwave manufacturers.

  • armymenrule

    July 11, 2012 at 12:02 pm

    thanks for the video james, keep them coming!!!!!!

  • stoney_1

    July 11, 2012 at 12:07 pm

    lol that was awesome!

  • GrandTickler

    July 11, 2012 at 1:58 pm

    buy a microwave with rotating knobs like i have lol

  • WyldeGoose

    July 11, 2012 at 2:08 pm

    You know, Microwave ovens are not just made for you. There’s a certain industry that uses microwave ovens a lot. Since it has to do with food, perhaps you can conjure up what industry I’m talking about. If you’re in a kitchen and you’re busy trying to come up with meals for dozens of people a night, it can get a little hectic and noisy. Those beeps on the oven are there to let you know that it’s functioning, and when it’s done, to remind you that, yes, you did put something in there a couple of minutes ago. People can and do forget. It happens.

    As someone else I’m sure mentioned, a Microwave Oven uses something called a magnetron to generate energy waves that excites the water molecules and other molecules in your food. This causes it to heat up internally.

    True, Microwaves are not perfect. And they are not great at every application. Anyone who’s ever attempted to cook a steak with one knows what I’m talking about.

  • Doresh

    July 11, 2012 at 3:16 pm

    If you hate beeping sounds, you should stay the hell away from mobile and smart phones. They have fake button press sounds and even a fake camer shot sound. And then there are the ring tones…

    I’ve seen this in movies and series before, so I finally have to ask: Why do you Americans need microwaves with at least 2 dozen buttons Oo ? Seriously, I live in Germany, and our microwave just has 2 (silent) dial switches: one for intensity, and one for the duration. Sure, you can’t input the duration down to the last second, but who needs a microwave that exact, anyways?

    And microwaves are actually pretty badass: They can burn you from the inside, which you won’t notice until its too late.
    This weird cobweb-pattern in every microwave-window? That’s the only thing stopping the microwave from frying YOU.

  • July 11, 2012 at 4:14 pm

    You know my fellow americans what else is bullshit on that piece of equipment? its hazard for your health as well and because i know that in the us they use it allot because its quick and easy it can be cause cancer because i read it somewhere.I remember once i have put there a simple sandwich to heat it a litle and it almost melted it in one minute! plus the fact that it tasted a litle strange when i have ate it.The beeps are not the only problem my friend james.

  • Omi-san

    July 11, 2012 at 4:16 pm

    It is weird how microwave ovens ALWAYS beep while most kitchen appliance don’t. On most modern electric appliances and devices, you can turn off the beeps easily, but not on the mircowave oven.

  • Maddy

    July 11, 2012 at 4:19 pm

    I recall older microwave ovens that didn’t beep at all. My grandmother used have one that didn’t have buttons but a timer that you’d twist for how long you wanted to heat the food up. No start button either. When you turn the timer the microwave comes on and when it runs out of time, it doesn’t beep but rather pleasantly dings. Just once. “Ding” Lovely.

    It didn’t have any special settings, either. It didn’t defrost or grill or transform into helicopter. It was either fucking on or fucking off.

    My old microwave was a beeping nightmare. When it was done heating your food it would beep loudly five fucking times. And you couldn’t hit clear or anything to make it stop. It went BEEEEP! BEEEEP! (three more times, you get the idea). I have a new microwave now that doesn’t beep as loudly but it still fucking beeps. They all beep now.

  • gamerz

    July 11, 2012 at 4:28 pm

    @peron : the mask is bullshit. I’m not a fan of the bullshit videos but they would be tolerable if the mask was not on. Unfortunately we have more of these videos with the mask on, now that’s bullshit.BULLSIHHHIITTTTT

  • J.J. McSandfarm

    July 11, 2012 at 5:52 pm

    James, you gotta do 4 way intersections sometime. Those things are total fucking bullshit.

  • Spottedfeather

    July 11, 2012 at 7:35 pm

    I loved all the previous BS videos, but lately…these videos with the masks, I’m sorry to say, aren’t very good. It seems as though it’s more about a character than anything else. Before, it was just you talking about something that frustrated you. Now, you’re really stretching to find things to be mad about. What happened to great BS videos like DVD And Blu-ray Cases, DVDs, and DVD packaging ? A beeping microwave ?….really ?

  • greedo

    July 11, 2012 at 9:25 pm

    As you know, James, I hate the mask, but I love this episode. I especially like the part where you stare at the microwave! But James, seriously! Didn’t you mother tell you that it was not safe to put aluminum foil in the microwave? For shame ! ;)

  • Lastgengamer

    July 11, 2012 at 11:12 pm

    That mask gives me nightmares. Good episode otherwise.

  • mac_guffin

    July 11, 2012 at 11:34 pm

    Love the mask, but hate the inconsistency in your voice. Sometimes it’s clear and sometimes the sound echos off the mask. Maybe you should dub the talking in the mask… if that doesn’t work, maybe you’re better off without it.

  • scals37

    July 12, 2012 at 1:01 am

    everyone’s a critic lol… waiting for the timer to hit 1 second and pressing cancel, I do the same thing all the time

  • christburner

    July 12, 2012 at 1:22 am

    cancel at :01…. i do this EVERY TIME …that triple beep nonsense is bull shit

  • m0desty

    July 12, 2012 at 3:43 am

    you know whats bull shit?, you know whats bull shit is bull shit, how bout board james or nuther avgn, mikes movie reviews are great and james nostalgic game memories. i spose ykwbs is for the kiddies………

  • Man In The Dark

    July 12, 2012 at 3:55 am

    I agree, especially living with others. In the dead of night every single beep makes me cringe. And of course aborting mission right before the “done” buzzer goes off is a must.

  • z_thompson

    July 12, 2012 at 4:37 am

    I have assholes where I work that open the microwave when there is 1 second left, then you can’t tell what time it is in the god damned break room…. ASSSHOOOOOOLES!!!!

    Also, you have to get a microwave with a dial on it to avoid the beeps! One that’s not digital… analog I guess?

  • Maddy

    July 12, 2012 at 5:02 am

    I wish to register a complaint!

    Only about the people who do nothing but complain about everything on this site.

    “I saw a commercial that lasted a whole fifteen seconds! ”

    Oh, god, NO! What a nightmare!

    Or what about this one:

    “I demand new AVGN videos!”

    and of course:

    “I hate the Mask! And obviously I’m much more important than you so I demand that you get rid of it!”

    What are you going to do if James doesn’t give you what you think you have the right to demand? Leave and never come back? Oh please! I dare ya.

    Yes, I know that I’m complaining about people who complain. Deal with it.

    James, you go on making your videos the way you want them to be made and if you feel like it , maybe take some of these whiners’ complaints under advisement.

    Rock on. \m/

  • Xen11

    July 12, 2012 at 7:27 am

    James,

    Love the mask.

    Signed,
    A Non-Retard

  • constachugga

    July 12, 2012 at 7:28 am

    you have a point about the beeping…
    next time i get a microwave,i’ll see if there’s a speaker in it,and rip it out.

  • Xen11

    July 12, 2012 at 7:29 am

    You know what bullshit that I just discovered.

    “ECO – FRIENDLY PACKAGING” on Blu-rays. I hear they are on DVDs and videogames too.

    You can feel the discs through the packaging. It’s hollow. It’s crap. It has a recycle symbol in the form of holes, exposing your discs as a big fuck you. It’s done purely for money purposes and nothing to do with being “eco-friendly”.

    I refuse to buy movies now unless I can feel a hard case protecting my precious discs. I go around stores now feeling the blu-rays like they are fucking fruit.

  • vsg1980

    July 12, 2012 at 10:39 am

    He looks like the Trash heap from Fraggle Rock.

  • liononzion

    July 12, 2012 at 11:04 am

    You wana know whats fucking bullshit?! i’ll tell ya whats fucking bullshit!

    Meter Maids,

    first of all the name. aren’t maids supposed to serve you? not give you a fucking ticket for parking in front of your own damn house. and whats their excuse? so they can clean the street? well maybe I dont want my steet cleaned, maybe I’d like like it to look like a pile of shit, or better yet howbout let me clean my own damn street if I feel like it.

    Then you get in your car and tell them you’re moving it and what do they say? “sorry I already wrote the ticket” and then drive off like assholes

    Now THATS fucking bullshit!!!

  • McBeth

    July 12, 2012 at 11:22 am

    Actually Micro waves were used for communications in Siberia.
    Soldiers noticed that there was little to no snow around the discs so they came closer in hopes to warm themselves up.

    Little did they know that their own flesh started to cook.

    What a micro wave basically do is to kick the water molecules in the ass to make them move faster. The faster molecules go, the warmer it is.

  • omegavandal

    July 12, 2012 at 12:10 pm

    Blind people maybe need this need.

  • kamen345

    July 12, 2012 at 1:12 pm

    Probably you are true. I have a microwave with too knobs and when it is over, it has a bell and it rings ones. NO BULLSHIT FOR ME!!!!!

  • z_thompson

    July 12, 2012 at 1:35 pm

    Yeah, that’s what I’m talkin’ about Kamen!
    My grandpa had one like that. You had to turn it past a minute, then set the time. And after the food was done it has a “ring” or a “chime” noise, instead of a beep.

  • crapcart

    July 12, 2012 at 1:58 pm

    microwaves for old fucks , im gonna be a millionaire

  • July 12, 2012 at 2:54 pm

    Funny that he says the phrase “at exactly two minutes” at exactly´╗┐ two minutes! (2:00)

  • wunderboner657

    July 12, 2012 at 3:44 pm

    FINALY!!!! You finaly released an episode on microwave bull shit!!

  • July 12, 2012 at 6:43 pm

    My microwave produces more beeps and bleeps than the AVGN.

  • July 12, 2012 at 6:46 pm

    You know what’s bull? Auto flushing toilets? You know sometimes you get in front of one and it flushes, right? Then you bend over to grab some T.P. and it flushes? Then you get up and it actually flushes like you want? Then you leave the stall and it flushes again. What a waste of water!

  • Calavera

    July 12, 2012 at 6:50 pm

    Search for Musical Microwave: Replacing Beeps with a Beat. It is a microwave with a USB port that will play any music file instead of beeping when the food is done. Now that is awesome!

  • ptbibble25

    July 12, 2012 at 9:22 pm

    Uhhhh I actually have forgotten about food in the microwave. I FEEL SO ASHAMED!

  • teleperia

    July 12, 2012 at 10:42 pm

    I bought a new microwave a couple years ago – a Kenmore Elite from Sears. They actually include an option to turn the beeping off. No beeping when pressing buttons and no beeping when the food is done. Hopefully this trend branches out to all microwaves soon.

  • JCrazy

    July 13, 2012 at 3:39 am

    LOL this one was good.
    Man I hate that though, I get up at 2am and go to the microwave to heat something up and all that beeping makes me feel like im waking everyone up. This is like an every night occurrence for me :l
    Good episode :D

  • Riddig

    July 13, 2012 at 5:46 am

    Hmm right that sound is a big load of bullshit
    I dont use my microwave cause i really got bad dreams from the noise ^^

    Sounds weird ? Wanns see u get punched out of a great dream with this shit !

  • Peron

    July 13, 2012 at 9:16 am

    That plate of glass also is a bullshit, if breaks you are screwed to find another similar

  • yassassass

    July 13, 2012 at 1:08 pm

    What the fuck is a microwave anyway? Should I get a regular size wave? You tell me! It’s a fucking box that makes stuff hot! How’s that happen? Why does it make the food warm, but when I leave a metal fork in there there’s sparks and flames! What kind of sorcery is this thing? Takes three minutes to heat up a bowl of soup but sets the foil wrap on my meatball sub in flames in a matter of seconds! Somebody invented it, it’s called a microwave oven, and it’s bullshit.

    -James Rolfe, July 10th, 2012

  • startrekalian

    July 13, 2012 at 10:24 pm

    These Bullshit vids are now bullshit. Hey, this guy sounds like Toxie LOL.

  • dutka

    July 14, 2012 at 1:37 am

    What about those microwaves that only do 30 seconds or more. It has been year since I used a microwave with just a simple start button. YOU KNOW THAT FUCKING BUTTON WHERE THE DAMN START SHOULD BE ON. I FUCKING HATE THE 30 SECOND BUTTON!!!!!!

  • richard19940706

    July 14, 2012 at 2:18 am

    The night after I first saw this video. I actually found, on my microwave, an button that said “Sound on/off” and it was actually a mute button for my microwave. My microwave is Hotpoint brand and my parents bought in 1997.

  • Meskalurator

    July 14, 2012 at 8:58 am

    I’m so glad my parents gave me the Electrolux NF 4031 microwave (made in usa) from ’85 or something, still works. Just two knobs, timer and power, and the only sound it makes, other than the humming, is a beautiful DING when it’s done. It’s glorious.

  • kakeroo

    July 14, 2012 at 9:20 am

    what i find interesting is how “no metal in the microwave” and the inside is clearly metal.

    for best results, just use the popcorn setting

    i know you’re just ranting about the beeps and i too hate those beeps (don’t disconnect the speaker inside) but the microwave works by passing wavelenths through the food which excites the water molicuals and they vibrate which in turn heats the food. the microwave does not heat anything without water. it will not heat a stone

  • TheTempleKnight

    July 14, 2012 at 12:54 pm

    Most rocks have water molecules though…

  • TheTempleKnight

    July 14, 2012 at 12:58 pm

    Oh, and just a sidebar comment…

    I still don’t understand the mask. I am not dissing the mask or hating on the shit mask… I just don’t get it.

    I thought this series was about a normal dude calling out some random bull shit stuff in life that is really annoying…

    Now the shit mask is introduced, and you would think that a character was born. An evil shit monster that was born from Bozo The Clown’s crusty underpants, maybe…

    But no… It’s the same premise as before, a normal guy… Except now he is wearing a shit mask.

    What? Weird. And not weird in the good way. Completely out of James’ element… I have watched pretty much every film of his ever uploaded here and it just doesn’t coincide with any of his other work.

    Disappointing that the whole premise of the series was altered without reason and what appears to be without any thought.

  • Zar

    July 14, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    Hahahaha,this one cracked me up. I am a nightowl in my house and I hate using the microwave late at night cause of the damn beeps. Hell,even the little door when I close it makes a loud noise that could wake anyone up. And keep that mask,man. The character and the voice have become an icon in my mind. Like the layman that expresses himself about the everyday problems we encounter and I appreciate that. Keep it up,James:)

  • Screenbones

    July 15, 2012 at 1:26 pm

    Make one about pay-to-play games! People are mad at Disney for making most of the features paid on Club Penguin, but at least they give us a free version!

  • Screenbones

    July 15, 2012 at 1:30 pm

    There is a logical reason it makes a metal fork spark. It doesnt cook with heat, it cooks with Micro-Waves!

  • Mini-Nerd

    July 15, 2012 at 9:01 pm

    Love the stock music. I actually do.

  • rokenroleg

    July 16, 2012 at 5:21 pm

    I know people are going to hate me for this.. but my microwave has a mute button. =)

  • unts

    July 19, 2012 at 5:54 pm

    In Portugal most microwaves don’t beep and the majority only has a power and time controllers. USA microwaves sure are complicated.

  • wespaul

    July 19, 2012 at 6:39 pm

    I’m surprised you didn’t talk about how it’s impossible to put the microwave plate back on the spinning rack after it’s slid off. It can’t be done, and it makes a huge clanging sound every 2 seconds it spins inside.

  • AVGNFAN505104

    July 27, 2012 at 6:13 pm

    I think Bullsh** is great right now1 I dont know why poeple are complaining. Microwaves are so BS. James is completely right. You know whats BS not being able to go to ConBravo!

  • dansims

    September 23, 2012 at 8:18 pm

    That beep thing must came from the beginning of the microwave birth, to show you how you are now in the FUTURE.
    What suprise me is that, why they dont let us shut up that fucking beep ?

  • Balints

    October 17, 2012 at 9:19 am

    Maybe these “beeps” help for blind people.
    So it’s not really a bullshit idea.

  • Iron65

    November 24, 2012 at 2:54 am

    Well actually It’s the only chapter I’m disagree! because that beep sounds supose to help people to hear when the food ends to cook… But at these times, at least they can put a button where deactive the sound -> that is real bulshit!

  • March 15, 2013 at 8:25 pm

    what the ass berries

  • April 20, 2013 at 3:58 am

    Should I get a regular sized wave? x)

  • May 10, 2013 at 3:49 am

    I wish it was like Back to the Future 2 where you put food in and its done in two seconds

  • Alan Fletcher

    January 28, 2014 at 10:08 pm

    I’ve been watching your videos for some time now and your very good at it. Rock on man!

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