Top 5 AVGN Quotes of 2010

James / December 27th, 2010

As the year 2010 comes to a close, I thought I’d look back at the AVGN quotes I enjoyed saying the most. This doesn’t reflect anything visual, just the quotes themselves. These choices are right off the top of my head, so I’m using memory as the filter.

5. STREET FIGHTER 2010
“Who would’ve thought that Street Fighter’s past lied in the future, which is now the present? Let’s take a look at this. I can only imagine, we’re gonna be Tiger Uppercutting through space and time, we’re gonna be throwing Sonic Booms on the moon, Hadoukens up Uranus! Fuck Street Fighter 4, this is Street Fighter 2010!”

4. SWORDQUEST
“The REAL Swordquest is the quest for that sword and the other treasures. They belong in the hands of gamers who earn them. You know, everybody who put those games in their Ataris had a chance of winning. It was something to dream about. But that dream’s been thrown about the toilet. It’s thirty years later, but I say the contest must go on. Finish the last game! You can’t have earth, fire, and water without air! The balance of the cosmos must be restored! The true bearer of that sword must be found! The kingdom of nerd-dom depends on it!”

3. HOW THE NERD STOLE CHRISTMAS
“What turkeys worked on this murky mess of monkey jerky? Some quirky jackass from Albuquerque?”

2. BACK TO THE FUTURE TRILOGY
“Why does LJN have to make every NES movie adaptation? Couldn’t they have given somebody else a try? No, they wanted to incorporate the entire spectrum of awfulness: PURPLE for putrid game play, BLUE for bad musical abominations, GREEN for graphical farts and garlic, YELLOW for piss poor lack of loyalty to source material, ORANGE for “orange (aren’t) you a fucking idiot?”, and RED for high-stress, anger-inducing masochism. Put that all together, you got all the colors of the shit rainbow. Hooray LJN.”

1. DR. JEKYLL AND MR. HYDE
“What happened? I killed a bee? I killed something! The only thing you can kill in the whole game, and it’s a little, tiny, stupid, FUCKING BEE!”

That’s my personal Top 5. What were your favorite quotes this year?

Comments

  • mantrox

    December 27, 2010 at 6:00 am

    Well, the Christmas Special is one giant pile of great quotes (I just love rhyming ;)) One of my other favourites is from Action 52 “(…)Oh a safety pin! That’ll be perfect! Next game!”

  • December 27, 2010 at 6:25 am

    CHRISTMAS SPECIAL:
    Hom much were they drinking?
    Why is it so stinking?
    I’m staring unblinking.
    What were they thinking!

    LESTER THE UNLIKELY:
    What’s the point. It’s all going to be dust one day.
    or
    It’s unlikely that it’s going to be a good game.

    NINJA GAIDEN:
    – I haven’t heard that name in ages. Normaly they say Ninja Gayden.
    – So that means I’m worthy?

    Those are just the ones I have in mind right now. But there are many other (most of them from Action 52 and Cheetahmen). Great season, great lines. Keep it up.

  • rsaotome

    December 27, 2010 at 6:45 am

    Not sure if it’s counted as a quote, but the exchange between the Nerd & Shit Pickle from the Action 52 video.

    Damn near every line from the Game Graphic Glitch Gremlin, from the Game Glitches video.

    Can’t really think of any episode I didn’t like this year, overall, a great year for the AVGN!

    Thanks James!

  • FreeID

    December 27, 2010 at 7:17 am

    you picked your own shit and call them “Top 5 of the year”??!! Wow, what kinda egoistic douchebag are you? I mean, USUALLY, people without a smug personality, make “top lists” of OTHER PEOPLE’S work to show appreciation, guess you REALLY appreciate yourself VERY much huh?

    Seriously, do you eat your own fart for supper?

    (Better silence me again before your fanbabies whine like bitches)

  • December 27, 2010 at 7:46 am

    Best quote of all times: “Watch the fucking language”
    Not 2010, but still – the best line in the whole series.

  • Volbla

    December 27, 2010 at 8:13 am

    @FreeID
    What are you talking about? He explicitly wrote “the AVGN quotes I enjoyed saying the most”. Are you seriously saying you have never felt pride or amusement over something you’ve created yourself? I don’t see anything wrong with indulging a little.

    I can’t think of anything off the top of my head. You probably picked the best ones, James.

  • Limerang

    December 27, 2010 at 9:00 am

    Favourite quote – if it counts as one – is totally the noise of the top gun plane flying off the TV screen 😀 so I guess the quote is “Pssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.”

  • Bloodhavoc

    December 27, 2010 at 9:19 am

    @FreeID
    Well I suppose you have no pride in yourself, do ya, ya genital wart on the nutsack of the mankind. Otherwise you would shut your hole…. no one asked you to read what James posts, nor did they tell you you had to come to the site. so if you don’t like it, shut the hell up and go play in traffic or something. James listed his personal favorite quotes that he said in 2010. I’m sure he’s had some quotes he wasn’t sure what he was wanting to say with, but that doesn’t give you the right to criticize him just because he takes pride in his work….. i think another said it best when he said “People too weak to follow their own dreams will always find a way to discourage yours.”

  • HeavyMetalFan420

    December 27, 2010 at 10:12 am

    5) Christmas special 2010- “Your a mean one, mister nerrd”
    4)Godzilla- “i was born to fuckin early”
    3)The Oddyssey- “I guess balls werent invented yet
    2) Christmas special 2010- “What were they drinking?
    “Why is it so stinking?
    “Im staring unblinking.
    “What were they thinking?!
    1)Castlevania Simons quest(first episode)- “This game sucks” CLASSIC FIRST LINE!!!! LONG LIVE THE NERD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • mastermind22

    December 27, 2010 at 10:25 am

    @James: Thank you for another great year and I hope for more in 2011.

    @Everyone: Please don’t give FreeID any mind, he’s just a troll wants you to respond back to him just for attention. Don’t give him what he wants

  • December 27, 2010 at 10:30 am

    Mine’s a toss up between the BTTF trilogy quote you posted and that end quote from Jekyll & Hyde where you stated all those psychological things that I thought was funny in its own way!

  • You Can Just Walk Over It

    December 27, 2010 at 10:43 am

    “Although I can say, the game is very true to the original TITLE of the book, The Strange CASE of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, because this game, is certainly a very strange case INDEED!”

    And hardly a quote, but the entire back to the future revelation on the super famicom with all the expressions from hearing the music and how the game actually paid tribute to the actual movies in a recognizable way.

  • adecourv

    December 27, 2010 at 10:54 am

    The LJN quote is my favorite.

  • Gonzalo_vm

    December 27, 2010 at 11:00 am

    The entire christmas special. That was awesome!!

  • avgnfan3

    December 27, 2010 at 11:37 am

    My favorite quote from Chirstmas 2010 was:
    Hom much were they drinking?
    Why is it so stinking?
    I’m staring unblinking.
    What were they thinking!

    Also from Action 52:
    Critical Bypass, it’s critical that I bypass this game. I dont know why but it just sounds funny!! And the one after from cheetaman: “IT SUCKS! MONKEY! FUCK! LIKE ALL! THE FUCKING! REST!

    sidenote: about the Hadoukens up Uranus quote, I always thought you said “up your anus” as a generic curse word, but now I see what you meant, damn my dirty mind.

    I also liked the LJN logo description, I put the whole thing on the comments section of the youtube trailer.

  • eddy149

    December 27, 2010 at 12:05 pm

    I liked the one from “Dr. Jekyll and Mr Hyde Re-revisited”:

    “What makes him think the church is gonna be any better? Is the priest gonna through candles at him? Is Jesus gonna climb off the fuckin cross and start hittin him with it?”

    That’s my favorite AVGN line EVER!

  • December 27, 2010 at 12:47 pm

    Watch that fuckin language! – xD holy shit i ROFLOL so bad xD

  • December 27, 2010 at 1:00 pm

    You had a great year James, every video has been sick.

  • SpeedyEric

    December 27, 2010 at 1:15 pm

    My favorite line of AVGN 2010 is the following:
    DR. JEKYLL & MR. HYDE: “Geez. Wouldn’t this be a good reason to call off the wedding? I mean he’s had quite a day. Wonder what the bride’s been doing. Probably talking about the dress or the f#ckin’ flowers or some $h!t Next thing, the groom arives covered in bomb ashes and bird $h!t. ‘Sorry, honey. I’m late. I had quite a day. All the living creatures and all the f#ckin’ townspeople tried to kill me. That’s all.’ What makes him think the church is gonna be any better? Is the priest gonna throw candles at him? Is Jesus gonna climb off the f#ckin’ cross and start hitting him with it?”

  • Cascade failure

    December 27, 2010 at 1:43 pm

    Dambusters.

    Those Damn Busters!

  • Luna_Midnite

    December 27, 2010 at 2:13 pm

    i don’t feed trolls, i only give them poison, cause unlike FreeID, he can’t spell worth crap, yet likes to diss James, how sad…i would mistype too if i had windows 95 without spel chek…oh did i spell that wrong?

  • kyberno

    December 27, 2010 at 2:16 pm

    umm… well… every quote is GREAT!! i can’t decide!

  • gattz

    December 27, 2010 at 2:43 pm

    Anything from the Ninja Gaiden episode

  • Zelda_Boy

    December 27, 2010 at 2:51 pm

    I don’t know if this is my favorite Quote, but one quote I really liked was from the BTTF Trilogy

    “a good Back to the Future game? there’s a good Back to the Future game!? And it was only in JAPAN!? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS FUCKING WORLD!!!!!?????”

    coincidentally, the last line of that quote is a very good, insightful philosophical question. XD

  • ScaryManiac

    December 27, 2010 at 4:34 pm

    Thank you for all the laughter, James 🙂

  • December 27, 2010 at 4:45 pm

    ,,……we’re gonna be throwing Sonic Booms on the moon, Hadoukens up Uranus…”

    First time I heard this I thought that you are saybg that we are going to throw Hadoukens up our …. :))

  • avgnfan96

    December 27, 2010 at 5:14 pm

    what a tub load of shit! 😀

  • danny

    December 27, 2010 at 5:42 pm

    2010 was one of your best years so far, keep up the great work and happy new year to James and everyone behind the scenes at Cinemassacre.

    @ Cascade failure: LOL!

  • DBK

    December 27, 2010 at 5:42 pm

    Don’t know if it’s from this year, but my favorite is:

    “Mediocre games with serious flaws are what you get for reaching into the dark depths of the NES library. You might as well be reaching into a dog’s asshole, cause all you’re gonna find is hit.”

    Gold!

  • gdol

    December 27, 2010 at 5:54 pm

    FUCK YES SWORDQUEST

  • FUUUUCCCKKKK

    December 27, 2010 at 6:04 pm

    Epic Quote from the SwordQuest Episode:
    (Im a French Canadian BTW sry for typo)

    The SwordQuest is the quest for that sword and the treasures. They belong in the hand of gamers who earn them. You know everybody who put those games in their Atari had a chance of winning, it was something to dream about but that dream has been thrown the toilet. Its 30 years later but I say the contest must go on. Finish the last game!!! You can’t have eart fire and water without air, the balance of the cosmos must be restored, the bearer of that sword must be found, the Kingdom of NERDS depends on it.

  • Schloss Ritter

    December 27, 2010 at 7:07 pm

    That sums it up nicely.

  • slash_archangel

    December 27, 2010 at 8:21 pm

    A quote from winter games I lol’ed for ages..

    Isn’t that the most beautiful radiant sound that has ever been blessed upon your soul. It’s exuberant tonality harmoniously blends the dying squeals of electronic goats with the melded rapture of bubbling diarrhea from a coyote’s crap hole..

    Awesome year thanks James

  • slash_archangel

    December 27, 2010 at 8:34 pm

    Oh and I nearly forgot my favourite from the exorcist 2 review :

    ” The movie has been beaten, filled with hallucinogens, gobbled up by satan, shat out, flushed off the face of the earth, raped by aliens carrying interstellar STD’s, launched back to earth, injected with radioactive poison eaten by godzilla and barfed onto the screen were it ended up being booed out of theatres “

  • December 27, 2010 at 9:47 pm

    My top 3:

    3.Ugh, Hydlide! Just saying the name gives you a gag reflex like you’re about to puke! HYDLIDE! Sounds so wretched and foul!

    2.You’re not even allowed to walk past anybody! When an enemy appears, you stop dead in your tracks and can’t move until you have a punching match to the death. There’s zero strategy, you just mash buttons. And what are these, hookers?! I guess this guy doesn’t understand the concept of a hooker. You’re supposed to fuck her, not fuck her up!!

    1. In each town, there’s a woman that restores your health. She invites Link inside, and you never see what’s happening in there. Is she giving him a potion? Is she performing a magic spell? No. We all know what’s really happening. Link is like, you know, getting a little of the ol’ in-out in-out. I mean, this isn’t little boy Link anymore, he’s grown up now. He learns all these special moves like the down-thrust and the up-thrust, and there, he learns the cunt-thrust. Yeah, that should be the name of a band. But really, Link deserves to get some because of all this hell he goes through. He’s not gonna get any from Zelda… Well, then again, she’s in a sleeping spell. What was Link doing there in the first place? Oh, no, Link’s a poon hound.

    (Yeah,I can appreciate a Clockwork orange joke. ^^)

  • culwin

    December 27, 2010 at 10:56 pm

    The LJN quote is a good one!

  • Analbag Thats Me

    December 27, 2010 at 11:24 pm

    Best Quote:

    Jeeze! Wouldn’t this be a good reason to call off the wedding? I mean he has had quite a day. Wonder how the bride’s been doing. She’s prolly worried about her dress or the color or the fucking flowers or some shit. Next thing, the groom shows up covered in bomb ashes and bird shit: “sorry honey, I’m late. I had quite a day, the whole living creatures in the whole fucking town trying to kill me that’s all.

    Every time my brother and I ask each other “hey, how’s it going?” the other now responds by saying “I’ve had quite a day! Everyone in the whole town’s been trying to kill me” hahaha classic! This actually has become part of my everyday vernacular. Well done!

  • Jigglysaint

    December 28, 2010 at 1:40 am

    Nice AVGN quotes. I can’t wait to see what 2011 has in store for the Nerd.

  • December 28, 2010 at 1:51 am

    Lester…Air humping, I don’t know what that does…you can’t hump the turtle.

    This “nerd” makes me look like Charles Bronson…Steve Urkel could beat the shit out of this guy!

  • almightydrewsus

    December 28, 2010 at 2:08 am

    I think my favorite quote is when you call Jekyll and Hyde the greatest game ever and describe it as the essence of human’s fight between good and evil.

  • Ty Hope

    December 28, 2010 at 4:59 am

    Good stuff James. Really looking forward to 2011!

    BTW, how much snow did you guys get? I’m in NJ right now and we got blasted.

  • Cyberian

    December 28, 2010 at 7:07 am

    Two of my favourite quotes from the Ninja Gaiden Outtakes

    Nerd: Yeah, yeah, ‘m doing good!
    Ninja: It’s not a woman.

    (From the before you do x, you must do y / last line)
    Nerd: FUCK!
    Ninja: Before you fuck, you must proper protection.

  • reaktor

    December 28, 2010 at 8:00 am

    let´s pop this fucker in

    timeless =))

  • Scy

    December 28, 2010 at 9:18 am

    “I’m gettin’ murdered! I’m gettin’ butt-fucked up the dick!”

  • December 28, 2010 at 10:44 am

    I agree with the list but I’d replace the number 3 one with this from Ninja Gaiden:

    “Whoever programmed this thing, I’d like to rip their fucking heart of their ass and show it to them so they can see how cold and black it is before they die!”

    Or Kevin from the same video:

    “NUNCHUUCK FUUCK!”

    Really I can fill the whole top 5 with nothing but Ninja master quotes.

    Truly 2010 was a vintage year. Keep up the good work James! (And please make a new “You know what’s bullshit!” 🙁 )

  • TLoZmastr

    December 28, 2010 at 12:51 pm

    My favorite ones are those from the zelda 2 review when he is saying the names of the enemies in the original zelda, but for me the best is the one of the tecktite:
    ” what’s that, a spider?….a tecktite….now what the fuck is a tecktite?! is that even a real word?.. I´ll look it up….yeah, it is, tecktite: any of several small glassy bodies occurring in australia and elsewhere now believed to have been produced by the impact of meteorites in the earth’s surface….yeah or a spider… well fuck!” XDDD

  • Cruiserfan

    December 28, 2010 at 2:57 pm

    Lester the Unlikely:
    “What does it matter? It’s all gonna be dust one day anyway…”

  • pikmintaro

    December 28, 2010 at 5:10 pm

    My favorite quote was from the Dr Jekyll, and Mr. Hyde one, I don’t remember the quote exactly, but it was something like this.

    *James commenting on how the book is called “The Strange case of Dr Jekyll, and Mr Hyde*

    James: Well it sure follows the book’s title well BECAUSE THIS GAME IS A VERY STRANGE CASE INDEED!!!

    That’s the one I remember the most, I thought it was hilarious.

  • Hourglass

    December 28, 2010 at 5:25 pm

    First off, gotta say thank you for another great year’s worth of videos. From your flagship AVGN to the awesomeness of the monster video reviews, 2010 was a great year for your viewers. Can’t wait to see what you have in store for 2011!

    As for your best quote, I’m going with your #4 on this list. The review you did of SwordQuest was one of my very favorite videos; So much history and information mixed with just the right amount of AVGN flair. Sure it wasn’t all that “angry”, but it didn’t need to be.
    Oh and, the music in that episode…epic!

  • Andrew Johnson

    December 28, 2010 at 5:34 pm

    from DR. JEKYLL i actually perferred: he has testicals for eyeballs.

  • December 28, 2010 at 9:02 pm

    Whichever video involved hippos and muckspreading.

  • jasonw131

    December 29, 2010 at 1:08 am

    From Action 52:

    “Whoever came up with this is an asshole!”

    TV Version: “Whoever came up with this is an ass****!

    Ass………hole? ASS****! TV makes alot of sense.

  • John07

    December 29, 2010 at 1:52 am

    James i want to thank you for and other year of good entertainment and i wish you all the best luck for the 2011.

  • Unluckiest7

    December 29, 2010 at 4:37 am

    My favorite quote from this year is also from Dr, Jekyll and Mr. Hyde but, boy is it a long one! It’s when you say:

    ” I think I get it…why, it’s the best game ever made. It’s more than a game. It exposes the duel nature of the human spirit. The only way to win the game, is to be Jekyll but you wanna be Hyde, so you can shoot shit! You see, it’s a constant battle between good and evil and Jekyll must stay farther along his path than Hyde, if Hyde gains the lead then evil will triumph over good and that’s the true conflict of the human soul! And to deny the evil completely would only force it into the subconcious mind, like a city broken into different social classes, people don’t wanna step outside their own boundaries, like Jekyll wandering into the wrong section of town, he’s unwelcome, nevertheless, he must abide by his own good nature. No wonder the cane doesn’t work! The game does not reward you for acting upon your malevolent intentions! It’s a proposed guideline for a set of morality rules to be programmed into real life! It uses the Victorian Era as a fundamental depiction of outward respectiability and inward lust, it’s a metephor for social and geographical fragmentation! It eludes the Froyd (Froid?) theory of repression in which unacceptable desires or impulses are excluded from the concious mind and left to operate on their own in the unconcious…or, you could just say, THE GAME FUCKING SUCKS!”

    Pure poetry. And as for my other choices:
    2. Back to the Future Trilogy
    3. How the nerd stole Christmas
    4. Swordquest
    5. What jasonw131 said.

    It’s been a great year James and I can’t wait to see what you have in store for us this coming year. All hail the kingdom of nerd-dom!

  • December 29, 2010 at 12:19 pm

    From the Flashback Episode 94: “I always thought Jason should shoot first”

  • December 29, 2010 at 3:37 pm

    “Out of the way you f**king ghosts here comes Ms. Tits!” – Action 52

  • BiB

    December 29, 2010 at 4:45 pm

    GET TEH POWER, NINTENDO POWER!!!!!!!!

  • jazzfunk

    December 29, 2010 at 6:19 pm

    BEEEEEE SEV’NTEEEEEEEEEN BAWWWWMER!!!!!!

  • jazzfunk

    December 29, 2010 at 6:20 pm

    BTW @Unluckiest7
    It’s Freud 😉

  • headcase

    December 29, 2010 at 6:43 pm

    Thanks for that Unluckiest7.

    Just a few favs from Zelda 2:

    “Well then what’s that? A… a… a Geiger Councilman? Oh. A rock.”

    “But really, Link deserves to get some because of all this hell he goes through. He’s not gonna get any from Zelda. Well, then again she’s in a sleeping spell. [beat] What was link doing there in the first place? Ohhhhh nooo. Link’s a poonhound.

    (Link holding a little boy over his head in triumph after rescuing him) “Somebody should make a T-shirt out of that”

    “Bottom line, it’s a good game, but a very frustrating one, I’ll never beat it as long as I live. Nope.”

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  • headcase

    December 29, 2010 at 8:37 pm

    More quotes picked up from a little marathon:

    “Don’t feel like fighting the boss at the end of stage 2? Well don’t, just walk away. He doesn’t even try to follow you, as if saying ‘fine, you fucking pussy.'”

    “Hmmm, I wonder where that bob-omb went? Ahh! Bob-omb bob-omb!”

    (Kevin) “A ninja must look beyond the borders of the screen”

    “Gee, what kind of enemy could I have for this game? I have 32 games left I have to program, so I have to hurry up. Ah, safety pin! That’ll be perfect! (hammers code for 2 seconds) Next game”

    “You’d rather do anything than spend it on a broken down dysfunctional disaster of programming, with games that crash, hideous jumping control, random characters, microscopic sprites, a marathon of mediocre space shooters, dying in mid-air, problems with proportion, misleading titles, misleading power-ups, embarrassing weapons, seizure inducing backgrounds, lack of enemies, games you can’t win, games you can’t lose, games that make no sense whatsoever, shitty graphics, shitty music, shitty menus, and a fuckton of other things.”

    “Tell me, if you’re programming a video game, and you have a choice of all the things that could be on the road, like mufflers, puddles of oil, traffic cones, hubcaps, fallen trash cans, open manholes, of all the things you could put there, why does your imagination go straight to dead cats?”

    (On the music in Cheetahmen for Genesis) “Sounds like something you’d hear if someone slipped on a banana peel.”

    “It’s the most literal interpretation of a movie. It’s about time so let’s have clocks! It’s about romance, let’s have hearts! Was this game designed by a human being, or did they just feed the movie into a computer to process and then shit out this nonsensical fuck-poop.”

  • AceRoller

    December 29, 2010 at 10:39 pm

    One of my favorites, from Action 52:

    “I’m running out of imagination here. I can’t decide for anything– especially when the game starts having a FUCKING SEIZURE!”

  • Bsimple

    December 30, 2010 at 7:49 am

    One of my favs from an old one, texas chainsaw massacre: One hundrer, you mean one hundred dollars??? Nooooooo, one hundred centavos. ¡ Of course ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS !

  • AceRoller

    December 30, 2010 at 11:44 am

    From Action 52 part II: Cheetahmen:

    “Well, I beat the game. At least I got as far as you could possibly go before it fucks out!”

    “Dude, think about it: A giant cheetah jumping over Saddam Hussein. Woooaah I never thought I’d see that!”

  • kingofmonsters

    December 30, 2010 at 1:28 pm

    all of them were hilarious

  • Nerdy Nerd

    December 30, 2010 at 4:28 pm

    I’ve got 2 of them and they are both from Ninja Gaiden – Outtakes
    “Yeah, I’m doing good, I’m doing good!”
    “It’s not a woman.”

    and…

    ”Before you leap you must look.”
    ”I looked, I looked!”
    ”Before you look you must think.”
    ”AAA!”
    ”Before you think you must feel.”
    ”FUCK!”
    ”Before you fuck you must use proper protection”

    I also like the…

    “Gee, what kind of enemy could I have for this game? I have 32 games left I have to program, so I have to hurry up. Ah, safety pin! That’ll be perfect! (hammers code for 2 seconds) Next game”

    “You’d rather do anything than spend it on a broken down dysfunctional disaster of programming, with games that crash, hideous jumping control, random characters, microscopic sprites, a marathon of mediocre space shooters, dying in mid-air, problems with proportion, misleading titles, misleading power-ups, embarrassing weapons, seizure inducing backgrounds, lack of enemies, games you can’t win, games you can’t lose, games that make no sense whatsoever, shitty graphics, shitty music, shitty menus, and a fuckton of other things.”

    “Tell me, if you’re programming a video game, and you have a choice of all the things that could be on the road, like mufflers, puddles of oil, traffic cones, hubcaps, fallen trash cans, open manholes, of all the things you could put there, why does your imagination go straight to dead cats?”

  • rcfrandsen

    December 30, 2010 at 7:59 pm

    NINJA GAIDEN BLOOPERS (shouldn’t really count but I laughed so hard)
    “Fuck!”
    “Before you fuck, you must have proper protection.”

  • December 30, 2010 at 10:45 pm

    From Hydlide (also from American Movie, of course)
    “Sometimes you win and sometimes you lose. But I guess it’s better than using drugs or alcohol because with drugs and alcohol you always LOSE.”

    Also from Hydlide
    “First, you bring up the menu and go to save. That sounds pretty simple, right? You just save the game. But, no, that’s not AT ALL how that works. All save does is give you a password. But it doesn’t SHOW you the password and you’ll never even know it’s there until you go down to password. And there ya go and NOW you gotta write the fucking thing down. The time it takes to write it down and then reenter it is almost the same time it takes to just start the game over. What were they thinking? They couldn’t come up with a better way?? How about just giving me the password AFTER I die? How about extra lives? How about a continue option, or, EVEN BETTER, how about a battery back-up like in Zelda and actually making save really SAVE the game. Load? When would I ever want to load a game from within the game? If I died, I’d be doing this from the main menu screen with the password option unlike the password option from the menu within the game which gives you the password you got from the save option?? Speed? Do I really care what that does?! GAME? Does that let me pick a DIFFERENT GAME because THAT WOULD BE A GOOD FUCKING IDEA!!”

  • Iceman300c

    December 31, 2010 at 1:45 am

    my favorite was at the end of Dr.Jekyll and Mr. Hyde Revisited when he explained the game and made it look like it made sense and said no fuck it it sucks

  • December 31, 2010 at 4:55 pm

    My favorite quote was when he went to E3 as the Nerd.

    “I didn’t even know they still made video games. I thought they stopped making video games in, like 1995 or something”

  • darkmartheight

    December 31, 2010 at 5:57 pm

    Will a Top 10 AVGN 2010 be on Screw Attack/Game Trailers?

  • brodystone8

    January 1, 2011 at 11:43 pm

    my favorite quote is probably #2 on your list that was just hilarious

  • Studler

    January 2, 2011 at 4:07 pm

    From “Back to the Future Trilogy”:
    “A GOOD ‘Back to the Future’ game? Somebody made a GOOD ‘Back to the Future’ game? And it was only in Japan? (pause) WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS FUCKIN’ WORLD?!!!”…”If you woulda went back in time and said to people ‘Hey, hey, there’s a GOOD Back to the Future game. Put this shit DOWN and go to Japan!’ They woulda looked at you like you were tellin’ ‘em to go (short pause) t-bag a goat on the surface of Mars.”

    That and “Fuck…That…Music” in response to the looped 1-bar music that plays at the end as well as throughout the whole “Back to the Future” game for NES.

  • Jenifer

    January 3, 2011 at 8:04 pm

    “the kindom of nerd-don depends on it!” love it!!!!

  • Jenifer

    January 3, 2011 at 8:10 pm

    oh! and i also love when you try soo desperately to explain why the “Dr. Jekyll and Msr. Hide” games fucking sucks… but it is worthless…. there is not excuse for that kind of suckiness… but i loved it!!

  • Crust

    January 5, 2011 at 2:43 pm

    My #1 is your #5, James. “…we’re gonna be Tiger Uppercutting through space and time, we’re gonna be throwing Sonic Booms on the moon, Hadoukens up Uranus! Fuck Street Fighter 4, this is Street Fighter 2010!”

    I quote this as often as is appropriate, which is very often. 😉

  • Technician Fry

    January 5, 2011 at 7:10 pm

    From the Action 52 “Illuminator”

    “The question is, how much more black could this be? And the answer…is none.”

    For some reason your line delivery on that one made it my favorite AVGN quote of all time

  • RobertMapplethorpe

    January 5, 2011 at 11:55 pm

    It always cracks me up, when the AVGN is imitating voices and sounds from the game. Like the “WAHWAHWAHWAH”-voices in the TurboGrafX Version of Fighting Street or of course the legendary “BEEE SEVENTEEEN BAAWMER”.

  • January 6, 2011 at 3:58 pm

    I will give you a quote! ” mommy I did a BOOM BOOM” as in the words of the NERD: BOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

  • January 6, 2011 at 4:01 pm

    http://www.vizzed.com/vizzedboard/retro/Index.php?ref=65348

    sorry forgot my own slice of boom by not posting this, I love James ans would eat his B$% M!

  • Cascade failure

    January 9, 2011 at 6:43 am

    My fav james quote of the year isn’t from the nerd, it’s from board james’s cameo in kickassia.

    Even though what he says isn’t really funny on it’s own, the fact that this ‘movie’ was interrupted so james could explain the rules of the game risk was hilarious, as was everyone’s reactions to it.

  • the_hitman86

    January 9, 2011 at 8:01 am

    My personal favourite was the monologue at the end of the Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde video about getting the meaning of the game. That was pretty hilarious.

    Either that or trying to figure out why all the towns people hate Jekyll so much. That episode was an instant classic.

  • TheRandomGamer

    January 10, 2011 at 8:59 pm

    My fav quote is… wait for it *dramatic drum roll*… IT’S TIME TO START DROPPIN SOME F BOMBS! and that huge string of curse words at the end of his godzilla review

  • misfit_ex

    January 15, 2011 at 11:09 am

    1. DR. JEKYLL AND MR. HYDE the better…fucking piece of deformed and bloody diarrhea!!!!!!

  • Samhain22

    January 16, 2011 at 11:45 am

    I loved the one on Nightmare on Elm Street where he cloned himself

    The Nerd: Hey wait wait wait wait I just cloned myself. I’m in a dream and I can do whatever I want so why don’t we all just stop playing this fucking game.
    Nerd Clones: Yeah!
    The Nerd: So to hell with that shit!
    Nerd Clone 1: Yeah to hell with that DAMN shit!
    Nerd Clone 2: To hell with that DAMN FUCKING shit!
    Nerd Clone 3: TO HELL WITH THAT GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING BULLSHIT!
    Nerd Clone 2: Relax…

  • QuartrGuy

    January 16, 2011 at 8:50 pm

    My favorite quote was near the end of the Back to the Future Re-Revisited episode…when the Nerd realized that there was…
    “A GOOD Back to the Future game…? Somebody made a GOOD Back to the Future game?? And it was only in JAPAN!? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS FUCKING WORLD!? We get THESE shitty games (holds up the NES and Genesis games), but not THAT one!? Like, what the hell? W-why would you do that? It’s GOOD! I mean, it’s not GREAT, but it’s the best God damn Back to the Future game I ever played; it’s actually a GAME! Why bury the gem and dig up the turd!? Innocent people have suffered through these fucking fuck-heaps! People have developed fuck-it-itis from this shit! People have gone on to live horrible lives kicking babies in the balls! If you would have gone back in time and said to people, ‘Hey, hey, there’s a GOOD Back to the Future game. Put this shit down, and go to Japan!’, they would have looked at you like you were telling them to go teabag a goat on the surface of Mars. Well, thank you for taking a fuckin’ shit on us all.”

  • icehead

    January 17, 2011 at 9:37 pm

    My favorite, actually, was delivered not by you, but by the Glitch Gremlin: “Oh, Clubber Lang, that could be a good one, let’s see what else I got up my sleeves, oop, I’m not wearing any, but for my final showstopper… feast your eyes… on THIS!”

    Why hasn’t the Glitch Gremlin become a recurring character on the show? Seriously, bring that little bugger back for more!

    Oh yeah, and I forgot about Pong consoles: “That’s why they made a home Pong console, so you could play it at home. And then, there was another one. And another one! And another one! And another one! And another one! And another one! There was like nine million fucking Pong consoles!” I had a good laugh at that. And another one. And another one. And another one…

  • January 19, 2011 at 3:56 am

    From your revisit to Back to the Future:
    “You fuckin’ processing, stop being so BLAST!”

    I laugh every time I hear it.

  • January 19, 2011 at 11:44 am

    My favorites from 2010:

    From the Game Glitches video:
    “It’s a clubberfuck!”
    That one makes me burst out laughing everytime. ( :

    From the Zelda II video:
    “What’s that? A huh… humm Gaikerkawnsomen? *WRONG* A rock…”
    I love how the name you made up is so random and yet, could exist as one of the enemy names from back then. ( :

  • July 28, 2011 at 8:02 pm

    “Okay, that would never happen today! That’s like if Sony said, ‘Okay! We’re going to come out with this new expansion module for the Playstation 3; you’re going to be able to play Xbox games on it!’ *Poker Face* There would be lawsuits up the ass!”

    Hahaha. That kind of stupidity back then makes me wonder, a: Atari didn’t know about this putrid fucksuck, or b: lawyers weren’t invented by the government yet..

    …………………./´¯/)
    ………………..,/¯../
    ………………./…./
    …………./´¯/’…’/´¯¯`·¸
    ………./’/…/…./……./¨¯\
    ……..(‘(…´…´…. ¯~/’…’) THAT
    ………\……………..’…../
    ……….”…\………. _.·´
    …………\…………..(
    …………..\………….\…

  • July 28, 2011 at 8:03 pm

    and of course, “It’s a clubberfuck!”

  • DevenGreen

    January 8, 2012 at 12:06 pm

    my favorite is either the logic is for pussies quote from the friday the 13th review or the quote about the 5200 controller looking like a phone used to talk to “Flying Fuckernauts or Astrobastards.”

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